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After they were seated, Pete asked, “How do you do it?”Dave looked surprised, “Do what?”“Keep up with all the women. I don’t mean the sex, although that’d be nice to know, too. I mean emotionally and psychologically.”Dave thought a minute, “I’m not entirely sure I’m understanding the question, but let me try this. Emotionally, I love all the women so I can just be natural and genuinely express my affection for each of them. I’m not always great at remembering what each one is up to and so sometimes I need a refresher. My wives know of my little problem and so sometimes they’ll help me through a conversation by leading questions to whomever.”“Were you always omni-female? I mean do you like every woman you meet?”“I do like every woman I meet,” Dave grinned. “I didn’t always. For ten years I liked only Alice. I was scared to be in the presence of any other woman, regardless of age or social position. I was intimidated, didn’t know what to say, felt like an oaf, and afraid they might want. What can you do? Honestly there’s not much you can do. Except kiss your ass good-bye. But I’d recommend kissing your loved ones first – no one likes ass breath, not even if it’s from a departing loved one. Hi, I’m Andrew J. Kolesar N.A.M.D. (Not A Medical Doctor) and I’m here to help you with your up coming, and eventual death. In this text we’ll explore many different and unorthodox ways of dealing with this little problem you have. Like most people on this planet you are probably sitting there freaking the fuck out. Why? You’re just dying. Happens to the best of us. So take a deep breath (if you are able to) and relax, it’s not gonna be all that bad. Unless you’re a really evil bastard and believe in Hell, then I guess you’re right. You’re probably fucked. All the other self-help booklets and the other shit that’s out there won’t prepare you for a damn thing. If you have bought any of these poorly written works, chuck’em. They’re trying to make money off you and your situation or.
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